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Saturday, August 7, 2010

Tales from Grimwold: Looking skyward

Kelan Pickle was so short even the ants looked down on him. It made for a very stressful and terrifying life, as almost everything he encountered was big enough to eat him; flies, beetles, spiders, and heaven forbid he ever met a mouse. That would be unthinkable. He could never out run a mouse. So rather than risk inevitable death he spent his time hiding under rocks by a trickling stream.
Kelan hadn't always been small. He was once the tallest ten year old boy in all of Grimwold. The prize of the Wizard of Galdorgalere. Not that the wizard cared particularly about that. The wizard was more interested in the fact that Kelan had another talent. He was a superb cook. Kelan had a talent for mixing the strangest of ingredients to make the finest of foods. He was simply incomparable to other cooks. But like all of the Wizard's employees he wasn't there of his own volition.
When news of Kelan's talents spread to the Wizard when Kelan was only eight years old, the wizard enticed him to his castle. The wizard claimed he had herbs and spices that Kelan had never even heard of. Dazzled by the idea of trying new flavours Kelan ignored his mothers's advice not to go with strangers and agreed to go with the wizard. But once he was there he was never able to leave. The wizard had put magic shackles round Kelan's ankles and chained him to his kitchen.Nothing would cut through the chains. Not knife, not cleaver, not axe.
Then one day the wizard accidentally left a box of potions in the kitchen after he'd reprimanded the washerboy because he couldn't see his reflection in his plates. Kelan saw his opportunity and threw a dish rag over the box to hide it. When the wizard left he snatched the box from the table and stashed it in the cupboard. When night fell and all were asleep, Kelan sneaked from his wooden cot in the corner of the kitchen and pulled the box from the cupboard. Each of the five vials in the box had writing on it but because Kelan couldn't read he had no idea what they did. Kelan didn't care. If he could use them to weaken the wizard's powers for long enough he might be able to free himself from his bondage.
Through the night he made his best Pelham Pie-the wizard's favourite dish-and tipped in every last drop of all the vials.
The next day, when the noon sun was blazing down, Kelan presented the wizard with his pie and watched as the wizard chomped his way through the crisp crust to the meaty potion beneath. When the wizard and licked the bowl clean Kelan saw his plan start to work.
The wizard sprouted bunny ears, his nose grew longer and crooked, his feet turned into horse hooves and he started to squawk like a chicken.
Whilst the wizard, perplexed by his sudden transformation, tried to overcome the forces controlling him Kelan snuck out of the wizard's long dining room and set to work trying free himself from his chains. He grabbed the wood axe by the fire and began smashing the metal blade against his ankle chain. As sparks flew into the air the wizard burst into the kitchen; his face contorted with rage and his bloodshot eyes bulging from his skull.
"Treacherous dog!" he growled, as he flicked the bunny ears from over his eyes.
Kelan frantically hammered the axe onto his chains, hoping one of the blows would smash through the metal before the wizard could unleash his powers.
"From now on you will pay for this betrayal," the wizard continued and raise a shaking arm that now looked more like a dog's paw. Clutched in his claws was his gnarled wand.
Kelan knew what was about to come and realised he'd been defeated. There was no escape now. All he did was close his eyes and wait for the escape of death. He half expected a brilliant white light when finally he opened his eyes again, but instead found he was still in the kitchen. Or at least he thought it was the kitchen. Everything in it was now a hundred times bigger than it was before. Even grains of dirt on the ground were like boulders he had to clamber over.
All around him were the huge, rusty links of the chains that once encircled his ankles, and there, looming over him with his long purple moustache and cloth cap, was the wicked wizard. A wry smile drew across his face.
"By making you as small as a nat," said the wizard, "I inflict on you the worst kind of punishment, for now you shall never be able to work your magic in the kitchen and will be forced to survive on dirt and dust. I would step on you like I do other insects but that would be too kind."
And with a deep chuckle that shook the ground Kelan stood on, the wizard stomped out of the kitchen and left Kelan alone in his new world.

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